Karezza is a tender, affectionate and demonstrative type of sexual intercourse - and it’s one that experts are saying will absolutely change intimacy with your partner. Pronounced ka-RET-za, the word stems from the Italian word meaning “caress.” This sexual technique places the highest emphasis on connection, touch and intimacy. The ultimate goal, unlike most other types of sex, is not to reach orgasm but rather to reach a state of harmony between partners and foster closeness and communication. In fact, during karezza sexual partners even intentionally delay orgasm in order to focus entirely on the emotional bond and connection.
Interested to learn more? The karezza method could be for you if you’re looking to spice things up (by slowing them down!) in your long-term relationship.
The Benefits of Karezza
Think of karezza as a type of sexual mindfulness. The act of being mindful encourages us to slow down, be in the present moment, and see, feel and experience things as they happen- and when you apply this to sex, truly amazing things can happen. So what are the benefits of the karezza method?
A Full-Body Experience
Karezza gives both partners the time and the freedom to soak up and savor the feelings of touch and connection during sex. The result? What was once a streamlined train barreling straight towards orgasm is now a full-body, multi-sensory experience. It leaves you feeling nourished and energized instead of exhausted.
Oxytocin - The Love Hormone
An orgasm typically inundates the brain with a massive amount of dopamine (the hormone responsible for pleasure and satisfaction). But in response to sexual stimulation, the karezza method allows oxytocin - the hormone most closely associated with bonding, intimacy and love - to flow more freely.
Beyond the Orgasm
The karezza method also allows couples to explore other forms of pleasure beyond the traditional orgasm. Doing so can relieve the pressure and/or anxiety many people feel to perform and climax during intercourse. The result is that sex becomes more about the experience and the journey rather than the end goal. And, you just might find that when the pressure of climaxing is lifted, it allows them to happen more easily! (Which is OK, too, by the way. When trying out karezza you don’t have to be afraid of orgasming - especially if it comes at the expense of enjoying the whole experience.)
Tips to Get Started with The Karezza Method
- Choose your partner with intention. This is not the type of sex to try out with a one-night-stand! Ideally this technique will be with a long-term partner in a trusting and secure relationship. It requires a type of intimacy that both partners need to be fully comfortable with.
- Talk about it first. The more you communicate with your partner about your desires and goals, the better. It still leaves plenty of space to explore and experiment, while both parties have their underlying expectations understood and can show up for one another in the ways they’re looking for.
- Start slowly. Start with touching, caressing, gazing, massaging, fondling etc. Explore your partner’s body, including places that you might typically overlook during sex. Incorporate compliments and praise for one another.
- Face one another with eyes open. When you’re ready, try to stick to positions where you can be face to face with as much body contact as possible.
- Focus on slowing it down. Take your time, stay present in the experience and be aware of any emotions you feel. Continue to prioritize communicating with your partner.